Dear Eloise,

I just adore you so, so much. I knew this love would be amazing and overwhelming and it certainly is, but it's so much more. Nothing has ever felt so right. 

I've been called a baby hog by your Grandma and your Dad. I can't help it. I want you always. But, you are just fine in almost anyone's arms. Sometimes you fuss for Dad the most, and it just breaks his heart. You love to play with him and love to look at him, but if I'm near, you want to sit on me and look at him. Sooner or later you will be a Daddy's girl, I'm sure.

We've been noticing that you love to be out and about. You are much happier when we are anywhere but home. And you love an audience. You pour on the charm whenever your realize anyone is looking. Cooing and wide-eyed, you love to entertain with your smile. Just last night you met Dad's best friend's parents for the first time. They had a houseful and instead of being scared you just looked all around and happily smiled as you were passed from one pair of arms to the next. Everyone commented on how happy you were and how social you seemed. I have to admit I was amazed myself. You were tired and probably a little hungry, but you powered through and loved on everyone.

We then went out to dinner and you ended up drifting off in your car seat so Daddy and I could enjoy our little date conversation. Your sweet nature and cooperation is not lost on me. I know you have such a great temperament.

 There is a strong gravitational pull I feel towards you. When I put you down at night I am relieved to know that you drift so peacefully to sleep, and that I 'll have a couple hours to catch up on the household chores and tv shows I've been neglecting, but after a few hours I miss you. And want to hold you again. And when too many hours have gone by at work I get anxious. Like there's a time limit on how long I can bear to be away from you. I think right now the longest has been 7 hours. I'm getting a little nervous that his isn't quite normal. That I shouldn't feel so out of place without you. I know there will come a day when I actually want to be away from you and will want to take a break. But not yet. Not right now.

I hope I'm giving enough attention to my work, friends, family and most importantly, your Dad. Because right now I'm just so incredibly lost in you and my love for you and my concern and joy in every moment of your life. Right now you come before all else, and I think that's how it should be. With Bremy in heaven and the worry I went through carrying you, I'm just letting myself enjoy you. In my heart I think I enjoy you even more given what we went through before you were here.

I hope you are enjoying us as well.

I love you my precious, darling girl!

All my Love,
Mommy